enjoyable evenings. last night was enjoyable. i had dinner with my dad to celebrate his birthday. we mutually agreed how nice it was to have pleasant conversation. afterward, he dropped me off on the south side to meet up w/ a. and some of her friends in celebration of her birthday. this sort of evening used to be commonplace. its rarity has made me point out this particular instance.

travel bug. i heard from ryan today. he sent a message from the general vicinity of patagonia. he actually wrote it while on the journey through drake passage. he claims to have been colder than me. probably. but more interesting were his comments about being attacked by various wildlife, primarily birds. he promises to get his blog back up soon. his constant site crashes are not a convincing story for the stability of linux. i expect pictures a few weeks after that.

martha has had several posts about her travels in europe. it brings back all the sweet memories of last year.

their comments, combined with my distaste for my current situation, is bringing on a case of the travel bug. i've got the frequent flyer miles, i just have to figure out where and why. new zealand seems to beckon. central america? maybe i should have done peace corps.

it is so cold outside, my teeth hurt.

i helped out here today.

the question of the real. perhaps i am melancholy. no. i do not feel melanchoy. i am melancholy. personified.

perhaps true communication isn't a funtion of directness, but of the language of metaphor. and all the time i've sought common meaning was futile because it simply cannot exist between two separate beings. and the closest we can get is the approximated interpretation of metaphor. symbol upon symbol. perhaps abstrations has nullified objectivity.

pittsburgh symphony at the vatican

housewarming party last night was a success. finally got to meet up with c. he's working on a little pet project here while finishing up things at CMU. i might help him out with some coding. a & m came, it was great to hang out with them. not to mention s & b from high school showed up. i wasn't really expecting that one. and thanks to mum for the dip and meatballs, they went over well too.

senselessness. an americorps member in pittsburgh was killed in a drive by shooting this weekend. i didn't work with her, but extremely frustrated and saddened by this news.

yesterday i had mate for the first time. mate is a south american tea. crystal and i went over to a friend of c's from argentina, who made it for us. the taste is kinda of hard to explain. it is a bit more evergreenish than regular tea. she added more sugar than usual since it was our first time, but i probably would have liked it a little less sweet than she made it.

quote out of context for the day: "and i'll play it for you when we're in the bathtub"

i just went for some chai at 'cafe mocha'. sometimes people look so beautiful all bundled up for the absurdly cold weather. their eyes clear, cheeks and noses red, hats pulled down tight.

i believe today is officially the coldest day of the winter. i hope it stays the coldest.

it is still raining

for c. there is far too much in the world i wish to capture, to preserve, to eternalize in a well crafted observation. there is far too much selfishness, even within myself. there is far too much impermanence and failure where i wish there to be an immovable pillar and unwavering loyalty. everything is delicately broken. the world is an empty shell, filled only with the replicas of long forgotten meaning. yet, somehow, at some point every day, out of oblivion, i find a smile carved right there in front of me.

i miss our private teas.

hahaha. happy new year. suckas.

hope you all had a merry christmas, happy hanukkah, or splendid festivus.

ryan will be spending new years in the southern hemisphere; in the falkland islands according to his itinerary. i'll be sure to link if he gets a satellite connection to update his blog.

the pope sends SMS.

the art of luck

martha reminds me about last year in edinburgh, about being abroad, and all that comes with it.

those latvians can drink. (this one's for you elan)

"The lengths that I will go to
The distance in your eyes
Oh no, I’ve said too much
I set it up" -REM

if you're looking for housing in manhattan, i can hook you up with a real estate agent at citi-habitats

bonnie scotia. a small glimpse into the graduation revelry.

so it was perfect snowman making weather yesterday. and what better way to spend a sunday afternoon?

crystal and her frosty buddha 'jean-pierre'

me and my...eh...snowthing

let it snow. i woke up today to the sound of a shovel outside. when i looked out my window, the weatherman was right, it was going to snow. and it still is. it's been quite a while since i've seen a snow storm. i think i'll enjoy staying in today and watching it fall.

the day ryan found permalinks.

back at home. 21 hrs of uptime. work tomorrow. too much internal conflict here to capture. bed. sleep.

more goodbyes. it's 5:30am local time. i'm waiting for my flight. i'm tired and would rather stay.

in section title 'misc', my mobile phone worked in the UK but i dared not find out what the rates were. time to fly away...�

more goodbyes. it's 5:30am local time. i'm waiting for my flight. i'm tired and would rather stay.

in section title 'misc', my mobile phone worked in the UK but i dared not find out what the rates were. time to fly away...

less than 24 hrs left in edinburgh. time to recover. the last night out with most of the folks around, ended at the wee red bar.

28 hrs awake with 2 fitfull hrs sleep on a plane. not to mention a long night ahead of me...

something to keep you busy while i'm flying to edinburgh.

If I were to wish for anything, I should not wish for wealth and power, but for the passionate sense of the potential, for the eye which, ever young and ardent, sees the possible. Pleasure disappoints, possibility never.
- Soren Kierkegaard (1813-1855)

holidays. spent a wonderfully relaxing thanksgiving weekend at my sister's in virginia. i flew with my parents down on thanksgiving morning, and to our surprise, there was no delay and really no extraordinary crowds. mum and dad got to spend more time with their grandson. the little guy seemed a little wary of the bearded men (my dad and me), but got used to it after a day.

tomorrow i leave for edinburgh. it will probably be a hectic week trying to get around to see everyone. claire has already been nice enough to arrange a dinner. nikki and crew will be celebrating her birthday and graduation. and there has been mention of a whisky society event.

then christmas will be here before i know it. seems like i'll have hardly been to work this month.

currently listening to duke ellington's satin doll on vinyl.

i'd like to hear more about this man.
i'm glad i was not on this bus.

i am now a man with a mission.

saturday i sat in a park and read for a couple hours. memories of last year. it was about 60, sunny, and folks were out walking their dogs. today, it's snowing.

mmmm, dinner at the 'rents house. afterwards we talked to my sister on my mobile speaker phone which worked surprisingly well. cheers to nokia.

microsoft employee gets canned after posting a picture.

you missed a great weekend. well, not all of you perhaps. this week's whirlwind sojourn to philly was great fun. friday i helped dave out getting dinner ready for that night after brunch with mum, that night i went out to dinner with emily and megan, and saturday was all prep and party to celebrate dave and shelly's engagement. they had friends in from boston, pittsburgh, baltimore, and more. the only real negative was that i forgot my camera, so no pictures to show.

short photo journal of a south korean visiting the north. worth a quick browse

drink dark beer. (courtesy my brother-in-law jeff)

i'm going back to edinburgh. graduation is the first week of december, and altho i already told the university that i won't be at the ceremony, several other folks will be back that week. it's something to look forward to, i can't wait.

crystal's goin shoe shopping.

a long and busy weekend. sunday i went to a 2.5 hour baptist service for work. then spent 6 hours at a club that my nonprofit was a sponsor for. all that the night at the symphony. today i was able to leave by 2:30 and met a friend for tea.

i heard a lot of bad news the past few days. but if nothing else, it is a reminder of how good i've got it.

going to the symphony tonight. one of the perks of my job is that i can get free tickets to cultural things like this through Pitt ARTS.

help out a friend of a friend, take a short survey.

ryan has me listed in his address book as 'white chocolate'. this has been a running joke of a nickname due to the fact there are multiple jason williamses in the nba.

art vs work. i'm starting to write again. my life seems to be settling to where the waters of thought can run a little clearer. the world is releaving its poetics to me. it just feels as if this time has been wasted, but hopefully it's much need preparation.

the other night i went to the studio/foundry with my roommate to help her with her sculpture. i learned a lot about the process of making a sculpture which was cool. eventually i should have a picture to show of what i helped with. but i'll leave that to be a surprise.

head hunters and recruiters keep calling and emailing. i'm not sure how hard to pursue. options always seem good, even if you don't take them, even if they force you to make decisions. and on top of all of that, i got an offer to move to NYC to live the lifestyle i did last year (in some respects, altho i'd have to find a way to support myself financially). tempting, tempting.

bottom line is i want passionate people around me. and as my friend moving to new york said, "people who read books and think outside the mass consumer/television culture. People who question the system and are worried more about real issues instead constantly talking about which new chain restaurant opened where. " people that do what they want, not what they're told they want.

zoze crazy jairmens von agane!

good news. i forgot to mention this early, but the work i submitted for my masters in creative writing has passed the external examination according to my advisor. that means i'm getting my diploma in dec. speaking of that dec graduation, i think i might head back to bonnie scotland to visit a few folks. i need to get myself organized a bit and get a flight.

'nother reading last night. this one was two short stories in the spirit of halloween--Edgar Allen Poe - The Cask of Amontillado and H.P. Lovecraft - In the Vault. the event was an american shorts reading series event. both readers were really quit good, and the venue, the mellon mansion at chatham college provided the perfect ambiance for the halloween motif.

as for halloween tonight, i don't really have any plans. none of my friends seem to return my calls. most likely i'll just spend the night catching up on some reading unless something else comes up later.

international communities. tonight i went to a poetry reading that was entirely in spanish. casey let me tag along to her friend's poetry reading. since i don't speak spanish, i went specifically to listen to the sounds and rhythms of poetry in another language. afterwards i went out with a few of the folks there for a drink and a bite. it was nice to have an international group to hang out with, even if was only for a night. the us, columbia, el salvador, and mexico were all represented. it felt good to be out meeting folks. especially interesting peeps with diverse backgrounds.

something else for philadelphia to be proud of: two of the most dangerous intersections in the nation.

this weekend i read. it was nice to feel like i was reading the quantity i was last year. i finally finished Atonement. two thirds of the way through, i was starting to have my doubts about it. but like most of the books i enjoy, that last third came through. next it's Catch-22, a staple that i never got around to reading.

i have to say that the latest strongbad emails have returned to their old form after a stint of not-so-funny emails.

here's a little preview of our pumpkins from the other night...

left to right--mine, casey's, crystal's.

last night casey, crystal and i carved pumpkins. there will be pictures to follow. maybe. not having broadband upload from home might cause significant delays. all the pumpkin-now-jack-o-lanterns are brilliant displays of the halloween spirit. in conjunction with that spirit, the weather seems to be turning colder. the radio said that the high would be in the mid 40s today.

its official, i didn't get the job in la. ryan said the new guy started today. he also said he wasn't impressed. after all that time it sounds like they still made the wrong decision.

last night i spent 3 hours on the phone. i haven't done that for years. but i needed to catch up with some peeps, and i had my new phone to try out. dave asked me to be in his wedding, that'll be my fifth. caught up with my sister and jen some as i hadn't talked to either of them in a while.

tomorrow night is pumpkin carving night. stop by with a pumpkin if you want to join in the fun. i have high expectations for crystal since she just graduated from art school.

my new phone

reconnected. and in case you didn't notice, dialup has been established.

two weekends, two weddings, too tired. yesterday i went to a friend's sister's wedding. she was the maid of honor, which meant we didn't get to talk or hang out as much as we would have liked, but that's just how it is when your in the wedding. it was the same way when i was in my sister's wedding. all the other wedding party dates were at the same table, so we all were in the same boat. i'm looking forward to having a weekend to spend entirely at home tho.

crystal was home from her fashion show when i got back. she said it went really well. good thing after all the work she put into it. i'm wanna see a tape or at least some pictures of it.

i think we're carving pumpkins tonight.

can't get dialup to work from the apartment yet. but at least i now have an apartment, phone line, heat and electric all functioning.

yesterday i found out that it is probably faster to walk home than to take the bus. i took the bus for two reasons: to try to minimize the amount of time in the rain, and to see how long it would take. next purchases will be a bicycle and a mobile phone.

disconnected. email and blog posts will be significantly decreased as i have no phone, let alone dsl in my new apartment.

the wedding weekend in philly went well. i got to see a lot of the family that i haven't seen in probably close to two years. even tho i stayed with megan, we only saw each other for about 3 or 4 hours total. she had to work, or i was out partying. emily was a good sport at the wedding. the in-laws were able to empathize with the introduction by fire to the murray clan.

yesterday i finished moving into my new apartment. its taking shape, crystal still has a lot more work to do than i do. we need to get the heat on and i need to get a phone...soon.

bright spots. PittArts holds free lunch lectures about once a week. not only do i get lunch, but also get to listen in to some something that is not related to what i deal with all day. and i definitely need more outside intellectual stimulation right now.

today's speaker was jeremy boyle. he is an artist that does installations 'bridging the boundary between visual art and the recording studio'. although i wasn't totally blow away, it was still interesting enough to make me want to visit the mattress factory.

after a long silence, elan had a few short things to say.
ryan keeps on rambling...literally.

ma & pa helped me get more stuff moved into my apartment last night. first stop was ikea for the bed, then to the apartment. i think my futon is way cool. and the 'hood @ night seemed good too. tonight i'm headed to philly for a wedding on friday night. but i plan to start living at my new place when i get back.

uninspired. have i mentioned that i haven't written a word since i've been back? this is not desirable in the least. but i did sign my lease, which means i now have an apartment that i am paying for but don't have time to move into.

blogging statistics i just read this short article on blog usage. i was actually surprised to find out that there are more females that blog than males. it also seem ironic since i just took a blogging survey for blogger.com.

congratulations to justin. he and jennifer have a new member to the family. i'll probably meet jeffrey michael before caleb michael.

for all you coffee drinkers out there. but really, can there be a fair trial in the italian capital of coffee?

12.5 hour days at a nonprofit, getting paid what i'm getting paid, is not worth it. esp when i spend half of it doing similar work to what i was doing in high school. today i am not happy. so i am going to bed.

friday night marcie and logi stopped here in pittsburgh on their way from ny to colorado. it was nice to see them, even if they only stayed for about 12 hrs. i'll post a pick when i get a chance.

i looked at apartments this weekend. i found one i want, i just need to get my roommate to want this one too. shouldnt be too hard, it's in our price range and is in a decent neighborhood with adaquate parking.

morning commute. fog laden city early morning eye headlight floating by halo beams shining. damp chill pulsing breath marks coffee scented wafts street spinning tires yellow bus flahing light trails red of dotted brakes.

we've created a 'book club' at work. today i borrowed casey's, my team member's, carnegie library card to get out the book for this fortnight. the smell of old books is such a comforting smell, and as i walked through the stacks of printed words, i had both a feeling overcome me that was somewhere between nostalgia and a fondness for the simplicity, wonder, and thought that can come from a good novel. there is something about the lineage of literature.

last night i saw a northern chorus in pittsburgh at the rex theater in the south side. all four bands were all pretty good, but i liked a northern chorus the best. all you who didn't show up missed a good show. it was cool to catch up with sam too. might meet up with those guys again to see broken social scene, another canadian indie band that is on tour.

and in other news i started looking for an apartment in pittsburgh. rents seem so cheap compared to what i am used to paying. i have a roommate, too, so we're looking for 2 bedroom places. she was an art student at CMU and is the type of creative person i want to be around. plus it should be a way into the artistic community in pgh, something i'll need if i'm around all year.

a few blog corrections.
sam's band is still touring, but they just had to take down the website for legal reasons. the rex theater in pgh tomorrow night. be there all you pgh peeps.

and please note that ryan instills fear in small children and feels and gives no love towards me. and he's single, go figure.

it looks as if the band sam was touring with decided to cut it short. i went to double check the time and venue, and it has been changed.

it's amazing how little time i am finding to read and write. i really havent written anything since i've been back. at least i have read about a quarter of a novel in the past week (about 10Xs slower than what i was at).

but i have spent lots of time with my mum. she is taking me to work in the mornings and picks me up after, each way between 45 to 75 mins. plus i've helped or made dinner the past couple nights. however, there is something significant lacking in this lifestyle. which reminds me, i need to go make my lunch for tomorrow.

people make you feel loved when you get back from being abroad for a year. thanks for the phone calls and emails megan, ryan, elan, haleema, emily, dave, mom, dad, heather...and those are just the ones off the top of my head.

after having lived in the UK for a year, i have the tendency to want to add extra U's to words.

culture shock. welcome back--no usable public transit, no fresh bakeries, nothing but chain restaurants and prepackaged food. no silence, no resting, no sense of enjoying life now, enjoying the present.

i know what i want. but its not going to be easy to get there.

[ignore this post if you did not know why i would be in LA]
got back from LA tonight. still haven't heard what i want to hear, and i don't like being put into the situation that they're going to end up leaving me in. i should get a final answer by next week. if not, i'll give them mine.

on the personal side of things, it was cool to see ryan for a few hours. he bought me dinner at a great sushi place--boy do i miss good sushi. then we just chilled at his place until i passed out from exhaustion.

speaking of passing out, goodnight.

updated pictures.
check out more highland pictures and a few more from edinburgh.

please let me know if you find any missing pictures or broken links. this is another minor redesign (you can now link directly to a picture and they have thumbnails).

back in pittsburgh. flights went well. on time and all. my luggage fared less well. one MIA, another DOA--the suitcase zipper broken...luckily not to the point where anything fell out. then i had it all taped shut in detroit customs. well, i'm approaching 24 hrs of awakeness. goodnight.

goodbye edinburgh. i will miss you.

having had several outings with people to say goodbye over the past few days, today i packed and then said my goodbye to edinburgh. we spent most of the day alone, enjoying one of those beautiful sunny days when it's warm when the sun is out and quite cool when it hides behind a cloud. i am sad to go, but take with me so many great memories and new friendships; much anticipation lies for what is just around the corner.

done. printed and bound. after more runaround this morning, including walking all the way to kings buildings, the final work is complete. i had an extra copy printed to lend to those that actually are interested in reading it. let me know and i'll put you on the waiting list.

last night was the last big night out. and it was everything that i could have hoped for. it started with the creative writing course last get together. then i walk over to new town with steve to wish ian a happy birthday. finally heading back to, where else, Medina, to meet back up with some of the tried and true creative writers as well as niki and the irish girls. niki elaine and i called it a night/morning after unsuccessfully looking for breakfast at 7:30 this morning. seems somewhat appropriate that i saw one more sunrise in edinburgh before i leave.

went to the scotland vs ireland rugby game today w/ erin and steve. it was my frist rugby game. i don't know all the rules, but it was pretty fun to watch. you have to respect guys that are willing to run full speed at each other and try to tackle. ireland won 29-10.

tonight is the last get together with the creative writing class. one last pint with the aspiring authors.

this week's photos are good.

murphy's law. i get up early, shower, and head to the lab to print out my portfolio and take it to the copier to have it printed and bound. of course, it couldn't be that simple. first i had to add money to my printing account, and the change machine was off, there goes about a half hour just trying to find the person in the library to get me change from the machine. then i forget to turn off double sided printing. then when i take it to the printer, he says that when it's reduced and bound that the left margin will not be big enough. ok, back to the computer lab, reformat, reprint (after adding more money to my account), go back to the printer. sorry, the machine just broke, come back in a few hours or maybe monday. i'll let you know when i have the final copies in my hands.

last night was steve's birthday celebration. some of us went to 'outsider' for dinner. my roasted duck breast has to rank as one of the best meals out i've had in the last year. after that, we went to 'the doctors' for a couple pints; when that closed we went to medina; when that closed we came back here. a good time was had by all.

i seem to have pulled or strained a muscle in my back which is annoying and distracting. never-the-less, i almost have a complete draft, laid out and ready for printing, with title page and all. hopefully everything will be done by the end of the week, and i can take to it printing monday and have a couple days in case something goes wrong before i leave.

my email inbox levels are finally back to normal (~70 outstanding messages), down from the 130 or so that were there when i got back from my trip.

quick plug for the canadian indie band my (ex)flatmate from edinburgh is touring with this month. don't miss sam 'singing like a girl'.

I rejoice that there are owls. Let them do the idiotic and maniacal hooting for men…. They represent the stark twilight and unsatisfied thoughts which all have. --Henry David Thoreau